Thursday, December 8, 2016

From the stage to the workroom!


 I had the honor to perform with the noted theatre personality Danish Hussain. A fine human being.
 With me were two gentlemen, Sattvic and Udit Parasher, who belonged to the performing industry. My coworkers in corporate parlance.
I was the rookie.  The play premiered and received a standing ovation. My involvement with the theatre forced me to compare the stage with the workroom, the corporate of which I have been a part of.

1) Strategy and Concept
Danish saw it all in his mind's eye and shared it with us. The concept was sold and accepted and rehearsal plans were drawn out keeping our schedules in mind. The goal was defined. There was nothing hidden. All of us were partners. The strategy to execute was flawless. 

2) Defined roles
The role of each performer is well defined. There is absolutely no overlap. Each role is an important one for the production to succeed. The uniqueness is celebrated.

3) Transparency
It’s imperative to be treated fairly and equally for success.  The brickbats and bouquets were discussed together. No behind the back ranting. There was no narrative or canard built up to strike a person down or raise him/her up.

4) Bonding
Our meals together were the bonding time.  Our performances were never discussed during this time. Politics, culture and industry and most importantly our lives was what we would talk about. Empathy developed from this time together.

5) Contingency plans.
The ability to have a Plan B in place. Udit was down with chicken pox and then Ashima, the production assistant. Nobody flipped. Reassigning happened, Udit recovered and performed

6) Talent
Talent has to be showcased. It has to be nurtured and cannot be trusted in the hands of apathetic personnel.   Big lesson I learned. A complete contrary to what I have experienced in the corporate.  Our individual talents were focused on with no sense of insecurity or sense of upstaging. Because he/she is good is the reason he/she is doing this was so refreshing.

7) Sycophancy sucks.
You cannot put a good show together if licking boots and networking is the key.  Its good work, good work, good work and good work alone that gets you the applause.

8) Dissent is healthy
The space to dissent is necessary and has to be respected.  It’s a healthy alternative and is the child telling the emperor that he is wearing no clothes.  Artists can suggest and not fear of being thrown out.

9) The man in charge is the expert.
Danish who led had a body of work behind him and was involved.  INVOLVED. He held hands, helped you push your style , gave his inputs, spent extra time with the weak (me) and most of all was egalitarian.  Supremacy gets you bad results.

11)HR management
Artistes have high energy levels and are generally killed by mediocrity.  Creative lots are more difficult to manage. It’s a wonder how directors manage to hold all together, create a team and execute the final product.

12) Credit
All who are even remotely involved with a production gets credit. Unflinchingly!  Which is why credit after a movie rolls on for a long time.

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Given up!

I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.
I have given up. I cannot see any change.

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”


― Mahatma Gandhi

Gandhiji gives hope!

Monday, July 18, 2016

Female Empowerment

We, the women in INDIA are treated more shabbily than the ones in our neighboring countries.  And in work space its even worse.  Patriarchal hegemony from society enters the work place.
All sexual harassment must be taken seriously. There is no little or more harassment.
This post is a general pointer for you and me:

1) "You must increase your tolerance"- If anyone tells you this whilst you are discussing a violation that happened to you, please walk away. This person has no business to be talking to you. And report this person.
2) "Holding hands, hugging is okay"- Sorry, It may be ok for you. But not for me. I choose who I want to hold hands and hug.
3) "It has happened to me. And see me now"!- Your experiences are not my yardstick. Too bad you are a weakling. I am not.
4)" Treat all that happened as experience" - Fuck you! My experience is my hard work, my dignity and esteem. That I was used is not experience for me.
5) " You move out of the department and we will place you elsewhere" - Excuse me! I an the one violated. Why should I move out. The person who made me feel so has to move out.
6)" He had fatherly feeling for you. You must respect that" - Fuck you again. My father does not make me feel like this. Does yours?
7) " Don't forget he has got you here. He is your mentor: - Super! So I sell my body to him?
8) ' You are not raped. no? - No, I am not raped. I was not held down physically and raped. But I felt a larger sense of exploitation. Do you understand, you screwball?
9) "You took so long to complain, so while the going was good you had no problem"- YOU IDIOT! I need this job. I bore cos naturally I thought things will change, They did not,
10) "Lets move on. Every one has learned their lesson'-  YOU MORON! I don't want everyone to learn their lesson. I want corrective action. In ancient societies its called punishment.

Women, please, you are a part of a rapidly changing society . You are empowered. Victimhood does not suit you. You are a part of industrialization and economics,
Speak up against oppression.
In case you do not get help anywhere please write to jsncw-wcd@nic.in


#QandeelBaloch
 

Monday, June 27, 2016

Who is your Manager? Modern Mahabharata!!!


Types of Managers:

Dhritarashtra:  Blind. Totally. Guided by another and gives his expert opinions based on the narration. Not a doer.

Sanjay: A narrator of events. Makes no opinion. But knows who the boss is. Albeit blind.

Yudhistra: Thinks he is righteous. Follows the rule book. Risk taker. But the stakes may be questionable.

Arjuna: The model manager . Shoots to kill with his team and shares. A leftist. Shares everything.

Bhima: No subject knowledge. Flexes his muscles and tackles the situation.  If he wins he does or he falls flat.

Karna: The underdog. Never rewarded. Keeps crying at every forum. Takes the battle to the end. But never wins it. The end is always certain. He gets killed.

Duryodhan: The guy who will get his target at every cost. Damn values and people.

Bhishma:  The most knowledgeable man. But has not progressed . A lot of respect and all praises. Many may turn up at his retirement party.

Drona: The insecure manager. Will maim his subordinate to aid nepotism. Dangerous to work with

Krishna:  A strategic person. Will philosophize and also create illusions. May create SOPs

AND

Draupadi: Has a gender benefit.  Arrogant. Does not put her foot down.  Capable of creating wars. And expects someone to rescue her always.

Come on, citizens of the Empire tell the bird who your manager is!!
Or has the bird missed any!



Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Plumage!!!!

Queen Elizabeth cannot visit the Empire (she wears a hat)
Hilary Clinton cannot visit the Empire (she wears short skirts)
Merkel , Germany ( she wears short skirts)
Angelina Jolie definitely cannot

On the other side

Donald Trump can
Andaleeb (lady asking for separate Kashmir) can.
Most of the Taliban can
All the above are dressed properly

as per

a  new fatwa , in the Empire ,on the feathers we wear. The author of this fatwa is P Freud. And if all the members of the Empire follow this fatwa they will look like P Freud, Goldfish and Vapidity.

The fatwa lacks punch words like decorum and is more like the personal taste of an individual's clothes.
Did the Empire  need this? No!

The fatwa only has to take care of decorum. Decorum is relative.
The criminals normally wear a suit and tie not tattoo and stripes!

But the bird is beautiful. She will show off her plumage and fly high. She can do it because she does not live on the ground of the Empire.

Fly with the bird!


 

Monday, May 9, 2016

Kathal achaar ( jack fruit pickle)

Heat Panch phoron in mustard oil
When it splutters add red chilly
Then vinegar
Let it boil
Add a bit hing
A little jaggery
Add in the kathal (jackfruit)
Keep it in a summer sun  in a ceramic jar ,as long as it is there
Eat it with lachcha or plain paratha!

My tribute to UP and Pragya Bharati from there!

The new ten!!!

The Ten Commandments of the Pastor

1. Thou shalt not be independent
2. Thou shalt not speak with anyone
3. Thou shalt inform every move to the Pastor
4. Thou shalt speaketh with a fake accent
5.Thou shalt mark every correspondence to the church
6. Thou shalt wear clothes that resemble a hijab or a nun"s habit
7. Thou should be servile
8. Thou should be fake
9. Thou are a woman . Behave like a slave
10. Thou , when you decide to work with me is doomed.

Saturday, May 7, 2016

To mothers and mothers!

Today is Mother's day. And the electronic media and print media is buzz with wishes. Fake and false!  Nine months and a lifelong role is a mother is back breaking.

For all the mothers from me:

1) take care of yourself. Sons and daughters and husbands go. You are eternal . You stay on.
2)never lose your feminity. Color your eyes with kohl , experiment with a new shade of lipstick .
3) invest in a hobby
4) have a house of your own
5)be in a position to earn money, always!
6) have friends of your own who you can talk to.
7) keep yourself fit. Fat is not done. It's unhealthy.
8) wear clothes of your choice. Damn them who judge. It's your body.
9)Say no to sex if you are tired or unwell.  
10)you'r stretch marks are your tattoo . Get another one if you want to.
11) remember when they have children they will think of you. May call you to take care of their kids. Be strong if you have to say no!
12) do not clutter your mind with useless and negative information. Learn to move away from swamps.
13)Don't fret to be included everywhere. You are better off where you are.
14) Secure your phones and laptops with passwords that only you can open. You also need privacy.
15) say no when you have to. Don't break your back by making your yeses happen.
16) and lastly you are Shakti. Strength . You can create and you can destroy .

Happy mother"s day!

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

The anatomy of a burn.

Four years ago I suffered a burn. It was as early as five in the morning. It was a bad one. The burn left a scar all the way from my upper leg to my forelimb. The brown discolouration on my skin is my Tatooo . What  I learned from my burn:
1)The pain of women who are burned for dowry or any such gender crimes
2)when hot water falls on your track pants, your burned skin sticks to the track. The brand was Reebok
3)your face turn ashen white when you see the epidermis on your track and your skin pink white
4)When the hot water fell I Instinctively crossed my legs and protected my private parts. Natures way of protection
5) I poured cold water on my burns and tears streamed down in pain. But I did not make a sound. So as not to disturb the others who were sleeping.
6) I dropped the kids to school with a straight face . By then bubbles with a thin sheath had formed on my legs.
7)I returned and waited for Dr Shenoy to show my burns. I had finished making breakfast and lunch.
8) I called up my work place to inform about my state feeling the sneer at the other end that this must a tiny scald.
9)My father hauled me into the car to take me to the good doctor. She gasped when she saw my legs.
10) I will never forget her kindness as she cleaned the wound with her own hands and my body responded to her kindness.
11) my younger twin placed a podgy little finger on one of the bubbles and it burst. A liquid streamed out. That was the last patch to heal
12) so that my legs rest, an old lady opened the doors of her home to me and cooked a meal. She is Pramilla Ben .
13) I wore long skirts and t shirts . Everyone wanted to see the burn on my leg and gasp and sympathise with me.
14) I realised burn is also a class issue. Women from my strata of society do not get burned.
15) the leg healed slowly but surely. The doctor burst every bubble ant neosprin powder was my best friend.
16) I also learned to limp to the kitchen and cut upon a packet of MTR bissi belle bath and cooked it for myself thus getting over the fear of fire. This curtesy was someone extremely close
17) picking up the scabs is an interesting hobby. And if you pull the scabs hard then a little blood oozes out
18) the resistance of your body and soul is put to test when you are burned.
19) while living you get a feel of how your body feels when your dead body is burned. Especially the Hindus.
20)Fire sustains and also kills.
21) my father who held me when I was born a pink baby was tears stricken when he saw my pink burned legs. Parents turn old .
22) lastly , caution in the kitchen is numero uno.

Umrao Jaan

न आँखों की मस्ती के मस्ताने हज़ारों हैं
इन आँखों से वाबस्ता अफ़साने हज़ारों हैं 

इक तुम ही नहीं तन्हाँ, उल्फ़त में मेरी रुसवा 
इस शहर में तुम जैसे दीवाने हज़ारों हैं 
इन आँखों की...

इक सिर्फ़ हम ही मय को, आँखों से पिलाते हैं 
कहने को तो दुनिया में मयख़ाने हज़ारों हैं 
इन आँखों की...

इस शम्म-ए-फ़रोज़ाँ को, आँधी से डराते हो 
इस शम्म-ए-फ़रोज़ाँ के परवाने हज़ारों हैं
इन आँखों की...

Hide or leather?

A silly ode

Leather Leather stuck on the chair
no amount of shampoo or soap can take your smell away
You are what shoes are made of
and you cannot roughshod people away,

On the day of judgment
when asked by GOD
of your affairs in your realm
there will be more cries from human
than the animals from which you were made of

Bootlicking takes one a long way
a lesson we can learn at the end of the day
but when the angels come to take you,
the devil has already taken you away,

leather try to be a nice belt or a bag
not a piece of gag
you are a thing of beauty
don't make it look like the bull you came from.




 

Thursday, April 28, 2016

The relevance of Kanhaiya kumar and Umar Khalid

Suddenly this country witnessed the birth of three young men,

Kanhaiya Kumar
Umar Khalid
Anirban Banerjee.

The above three are students of JNU, a prestigious university. There was a meeting organised outside the JNU and a video floated with masked guys shouting anti INDIA  slogans. They were leaders of student bodies.

The above three were arrested on grounds of sedition.
Lets forget the legality of the case, however, the country was caught in a debate of nationalism.
The three were released subsequently. There was no matter to keep them in jail.
The system made errors. But the young men stood ground.

Kanhaiya made a speech that once again gave us goose bumps. And made us question why we keep quiet when we are beaten badly

Manuvaad se aazadi
Poonjivaad se aazadi
Brahmanvaad se aazadi
Sanghvaad se aazadi
Bhookhmari se aazadi.


Hats off to you, guys!!!

Jai Hind!


Tuesday, April 26, 2016

She strikes again......

Vapidity excels at this.
Monday morning she calls the Singer and says, You have not been answering P Freud's call over the weekend. Put in your papers'
I like Vapidity's style. Like a James Bond. 
The Singer is a toughie and came to the bird.
The bird had a little chat with Vapidity.

1) What if Singer takes a drastic step? Vapidity is in the gaol then.
2)Where is Vapidity's soft skill. Handling humans is the prerequisite of her department.
3)The bird gently reminded Vapidity that the Singer is not Sabina.

The bird had a chat with the Emperor.
'People in power have also the power to be compassionate, the bird told the Emperor. Grace and elegance in crisis is the hallmark of leaders,
This country performed the last rites for Kasab, a known terrorist. That is our compassion.

On a side note, wonder why the Pastor is not hauled. Somebody is saving his butt. And why is he not asking the Singer to resign.
Pastor and his ilk have to be straightened up. But then the bird was reminded that the Pastor belonged to the Royal Circus of Monkeys. And this circus is immune to all the tests of idiocy and sycophancy.

Ha ha ha ha ha

Chirp Chirp chirp the bird has to fly away!!!!





















 

Friday, April 15, 2016

What is happening in the Empire???

Yesterday I was rushing to leave when I saw two women wearing long white overcoats (like that of doctors) carrying cartons.

They had their eyes downcast and looked like members of the vampire kingdom. No smile and no twinkle in their eye!
My imagination ran wild and I could see human offal in the cartons. Maybe thats what they do. There must be a secret morgue on the top. And these people must be dissecting cadavers.

Ah! then I realized. These poor creatures come from the place where there is no smoke and people. Our much coveted space of brain work that has not created even a safety pin. Such waste make the bird weep.
Demolish what you do not need!
The next question why are these creatures moving like undertaker's sidekick.

I must ask Goldfish.

And the most creative person is leaving the Empire

Dear Blog,
.
I am feeling not too good. Santana is leaving the Empire. A hard worker , strong value system and a keen sense of music.
A rock star who loves his mother to bits.
I could sense his awe of Che( which developed right in front  of me). He was a sponge. He lapped on to my little knowledge of movies and very soon became a Pilger fan.

Chicken Pattice made by his uncle found way to my table. Tales of an Aunty who made the best fish curry and vindaloo  got my digestive juices running.
He is a combination of a Protestant and Catholic marriage and is baptized twice.
When I would profess my anti ritualistic sermons he would listen patiently agreeing to points.
According to me, it this value that will take him far in life. Not being dogmatic and assimilating, what seems right, even though you felt otherwise.

I knew his band members through him. The fear of losing his lead singer ( i think) to marriage or having to sing a Bollywood song was visible.

Go on, in life! Carpe Diem! Kill them all!
And I know you will feel good hearing this from a non believer, May God always be with you!.