Sunday, August 31, 2014


Do you remember?
the scent I wore ,
the chignon,
the sound of my
bangles and anklets,
the splendour of my earring,
I forgot...........

Let us remember again.............

Monday, August 25, 2014

Perfect Murder


On a clinical hospital bench,

I sat waiting,

For the end,

To begin,

An all pervading antiseptic odor

Not worse than the smell

Of death,

A genetic movement in my womb,

A chance for me to play


To roll the dice,

As I was wheeled in,

Sodium Penthonal

The perfect deliverer from torture,


A trip to no man’s land,

Will I be back?

I don’t know,

Do I care?


I haven’t drowned in the mystery of your eyes,

Or seen the first snow flake of this winter.

A scalpel that scrapped my inner lining,

But refused to erode my spirit,

Some blood, some tissue and no concern

Were emptied

From one vessel to another,

Living to stainless steel.

A journey,

From conception to death,

I looked closely at the mass,

Trying to find me,

It is a lie,

There is nothing of me

For I don’t die easily.


This was a perfect murder.

Groggily I walk out

The sun’s rays hitting me,

And I wonder,

Why sodium penthonal is always not available/

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

My loss!

Today is a humid day here.
I planned to wear a top that needed a strapless bra. Wow! The one that I purchased from Lafayette for 120 Eur would come handy today!!!!
I opened my drawer where these things are kept with more care than I would my jewels. I searched gently and then I panicked on not finding it.  I behaved expectedly. Began throwing everything around but nada!

And then mausi came with my tea. Mausi is my help, physician, confidante and philosopher. Mausi hails from a rural village of Chhapra, Bihar! Like the many, she and her husband migrated to this city many years ago. And she has been with us!

Kya dhoond rahi ho? (what are you looking for?), she asked in a strong accent
Tum nahin samjhongi, (you will not understand). I said dismissively.
Paehle se hi tay kiya? (You have prematurely concluded), she said philosophically.

I showed her another strapless one and said there was another one like this. Did you see it?

She sighed.
Maine ek garib ko de di, she said
KYA. (WHAT), I screamed.
'Tum kamati ho, tumhara gharwala kamata hain aur yeh bin handle wala, fata pehenti ho?, (you are earning, your husband is earning and yet you wear torn clothes?
I was hysterical. I cried! I wailed!I kicked!!!
Kanjoos kahin ki (miser that you are). she said like a sour puss and walked away!

If you see any garib with a strapless peach Victoria Secret bra that is mine!!!!!! But be assured that she will look great!!!!And maybe feels great too!!!

I am sure Gudiya is reading this and laughing....Grrrr!!!Grrr!!!

Sunday, August 17, 2014

I wish I could.....

I wish I could read music
I wish I could paint like Monet
I wish I could dance like Isadora
I wish I could emote like Ghalib
I wish I could be more dervish like,
I wish I could bake like Racheal
I wish I could master the art of writing Haiku
I wish I could read Hindi more fluently ( so that I can read Uncle's books)
I wish I could think in Spanish
I wish I could decide which version of Carmen is better (endless debates with Chetan)
I wish somebody wrote Anna Karenina in an abridged version.
I wish I had a personal jeweller who would recreate for me trinkets worn by the characters of Sarat Chandra Chattopadhyaya.
At the moment I wish I could break the handi that these men are struggling to break for the past two hours.....
I  wish that I always have wishes....
Raison d'etre

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Why not good looking men?

So the boss man wants to have presentable women in the team in a back-office function. Presentable women means not obese, not balding, no jutting teeth yada yada yada.
Surprisingly the feminist in me did not revolt!
I thought why cannot I have good looking men in the team. Why have I to be around bald, pot bellied, out-of-shape men?
I need a gora chitta munda from Delhi!!!WIth drooping eyes! and fair skin! and a punjabi accented English!!!
It is okay if he has no brains....I have enough of them......
His job would be to add glamour to the team, stand in the exhibition booth and placate irritated women customers!!!

And that is my agenda for the meeting with the boss man!!!!!!

Oye! tussi kithe ho?


Yesterday I laundered my clothes,
Trichroloethanised your smell and touch,
The volatiles mingled in the little shop
where the burning coals eased creases,
and a young lad from hinterland hummed raunchy tunes ,

when you have the time,
and want to meet yourself,

come over to the little laundry.....
a little bit of you is still there!

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Socialist space!

At last I work in a space that would have been Marx"s delight. All are Managers and Presidents!
Marxism thrives!!!